My dad once told me "there's an easy way to learn a lesson and there's a hard way."
My grandmother once told me "if the rules aren't bent, don't bend them."
I grew up thinking that people be one good at loving others because they grew up learning how to love or just wasn't loved enough. With that logic, you'd think everyone would be loving, but I'm this world, that's the most flawed logic. I stay up at night thinking about it. About which one is my case, whether I grew up learning how to love or I wasn't loved enough. I think I learned how to love but never believed in love until I realized I wasn't loving others enough.
As I'm typing this, I'm listening to "I Never Told You" by Combine Caillat...and everything is making sense.
I was expecting and anticipating talking to Vanessa all day, only for her call me and say that she was going underground for a dew days until Saturday. Which may not seem like a big deal to most, but one day without her and I spaz out. I want to work out our recently issues and get past this. Although I know she needs her space, i feel like im here, trying to make things work and shes running away. But you can only run from your problems for so long before they catch back up to you.
My relationship with vanessa is definitely one that can't be compared to anyone else's. I absolutely melt just thinking about her. I think about her constantly. I love her perfections, her imperfections and the little things she does makes me go batshit crazy. I can't see me being with anyone else. If I didn't love her, I wouldn't be going through all the relationship bullshit drama we have. I want to work out everything.
I just want her to know that although ive been patient for quite some time, my patience is running thin and that im ready for a real commited relstionship. That im ready to finally hold her in my arms and miss her. And know that nothing can and will ever take that feeling away from me.
11:03 p.m. - 2011-02-02
Recent entries:
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Not all heroes wear capes - 2018-02-25
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