There comes a time in life when you finally hit the wall that you were trying so desperately to avoid...and when you quit fighting it and smack the wall face first, you realize it wasn't as bad as you hyped it up to be.
I made excuses about myself for a long time. I was living and acting how Vanessa wanted me to be. So I stopped drinking as much, stopped smoking as much, took my tounge ring out, changed my foul language at times and was a complete different person. I got so lost in that "new" person that I forgot who I was and what I stood for. What I would or wouldn't allow....all for a person who couldn't admit that the way I was wasn't good enough for her. And where did that leave me? What did she ever do for me? Where was she when i needed help?
..some change.
With Sara, I'm free to be the corny geek that i am and i can be exactly who i was and thats okay. I dont have to try to become someone that im not, I don't have to use big vocabulary and shit. She truely loves me for who I am and although she doesn't necessarily want me smoking, she understands that quitting isnt gonna be something that happens overnight. It amazes me sometimes how much me and Sara gel. Multiple people on both sides of our families have told us to quit the shenanigans and just get our wedding over with. Before we start ringing wedding bells, we are going to permanently move in together to test try our long lasting relationship.
Being with Sara and removing myself from the Vanessa drama wheel is a perfect way to start off 2012!!
12:00 a.m. - 2012-01-01
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